Matthew 15:21-28
The
events in this part of Matthew’s gospel take place in the area of Sidon and
Tyre, which is modern-day Beirut. It was
outside specifically Jewish territory in Jesus’ time, even as it is outside Israel
now. What sent him there? Matthew doesn’t really say, but in both his
gospel and Mark’s this episode follows a lot of controversy with his opponents
and taking a lot of criticism from the religious authorities, and in Mark 7:24
we read that
“He entered a house and did not want anyone to
know he was there. Yet he could not
escape notice.”
In other words, Jesus needed a break. Anybody who is a caregiver or who faces a lot
of human need on a regular basis knows the feeling of just wanting to get away
for a short while. As one of my social
worker friends once said, “You want to go where nobody knows your name.”
There’s
a movie from 1991 called What about Bob?
where Richard Dreyfus plays a psychiatrist with Bill Murray as “Bob”, a
particularly determined and resourceful patient who will not leave him alone
even on vacation. Bob tracks down his
doctor to a small town where he and his family are staying and demands
care. It looks like this:[1]
It’s not all that different from what happened
to Jesus.
“Just then a Canaanite woman from
that region came out and started shouting, ‘Have mercy on me, Lord, Son of
David; my daughter is tormented by a demon.’” [Matthew 15:22]
Now, this woman’s situation, where she’s
looking for help for her daughter, is not the same as Bob’s “Gimme! Gimme!
Gimme!” All the same, there may
have been times that Jesus felt drained by the constant demands for his help, even
the most legitimate.
Surely
you know someone who is kind and caring and who, because of that, makes a
contribution to a charity that puts their name onto their mailing list, and
then a few months later other charities begin to send request letters and
before too long sorting through appeals of one sort or another are part of the
daily routine. If I’m asked about it,
and I sometimes am, I generally suggest picking one or two causes that are
close to your heart and helping them, while trusting that someone else will
cover the others. Jesus tried to do
something like that when he said,
“I was sent only to the lost sheep of the house
of Israel.” [Matthew
15:24]
At the same time, though, he couldn’t just
close his heart to the genuine and persistent love of this mother for her
daughter and eventually that won the day for her.
“But she came and knelt before him, saying,
‘Lord, help me.’ He answered, ‘It is not fair to take the children’s food and
throw it to the dogs.’ She said, ‘Yes, Lord, yet even the dogs eat the crumbs that
fall from their masters’ table.’ Then Jesus answered her, ‘Woman, great is your faith! Let it
be done for you as you wish.’ And her daughter was healed instantly.” [Matthew 15:25-28]
“Compassion
fatigue” is real. There are recommendations
that were put out by a group called “The American Institute for Stress” (you’ve
got to love that name!) specifically for medical personnel, for whom it comes
up all the time.
“Do:
Find someone to talk to.
Understand that the pain
you feel is normal.
Exercise and eat
properly.
Get enough sleep.
Take some time off.
Develop interests outside
of medicine.
Identify what’s important
to you.
Don’t:
Blame others.
Look for a new job, buy a
new car, get a divorce or have an affair.
Fall into the habit of
complaining with your colleagues.
Hire a lawyer.
Work harder and longer.
Self-medicate.
Neglect your own needs
and interests.”[2]
All of that is good
advice, but I want to add to that another resource that didn’t make it onto
that list, one that a certain mother, overwhelmed by her daughter’s needs, was
able to find and to access. That is to
seek help from Jesus, who made a general offer:
“Come to me, all you that are weary and are
carrying heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon
you, and learn from me; for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find
rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”
[Matthew 11:28-30]
Jesus models for us all the proper and necessary
balance between focused care and general care, between rest and work, between
prayer and service, that makes teaching and healing and peacemaking and feeding
the hungry and parenting and healthy marriages or relationships of all kinds
effective. When things are too extreme,
he helps to carry the load; and when the time comes to put things back on us,
he knows how to do that, too, in a compassionate way.
Do
you know what happened after Jesus had his time away from things, punctuated by
this encounter with a mother troubled for her daughter? Matthew says that
“After Jesus had left that place, he passed
along the Sea of Galilee, and he went up the mountain, where he sat down. Great crowds came
to him, bringing with them the lame, the maimed, the blind, the mute, and many
others. They put them at his feet, and he cured them, so that the crowd
was amazed when they saw the mute speaking, the maimed whole, the lame walking,
and the blind seeing. And they praised the God of Israel.”
[Matthew 15:29-31]
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